{"id":111,"date":"2022-02-01T13:46:00","date_gmt":"2022-02-01T13:46:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/?p=111"},"modified":"2022-03-13T10:32:17","modified_gmt":"2022-03-13T10:32:17","slug":"historic-week-at-our-summer-camp","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/?p=111","title":{"rendered":"13 Ways to Boost Your Daughter’s Self-Esteem"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

How to help girls build confidence based on what they can do, not what they look like<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

By:<\/strong> Juliann Garey<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n

In a culture saturated with digitally altered images of impossibly thin women, raising girls with high self-esteem can be daunting indeed. But as parents, you have great influence\u2014both by what you say and what you do. Here\u2019s some advice from experts Catherine Steiner-Adair, EdD, a clinicalpsychologist, <\/dfn><\/span>school consultant and creator of the \u201cFull of Ourselves,\u201d a social-emotional program for girls, Anea Bogue, MA, author (9 Ways We Are Screwing Up Our Girls and How We Can Stop),<\/em>and the creator of REALgirl, an empowerment program for girls<\/a>, and Mary Rooney, PhD, a clinical psychologist <\/span>who specializes in adolescents.<\/p>\n

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1. Model body acceptance<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

Moms have a huge impact on their daughters\u2019 body image. Don\u2019t ask, \u201cDo these jeans make me look fat?\u201d or obsess out loud about food or put your appearance down. Avoid what Dr. Steiner-Adair calls the \u201cmorality of orality\u201d\u2014talking about food and yourself as \u201cgood\u201d or \u201cbad.\u201d As in: I was bad today: I had pizza. So I\u2019m not going to have dessert.<\/p>\n

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2. Make your daughter media literate<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cWatch TV with her and talk about what you see,\u201d says Dr. Steiner-Adair. \u201cHelp her develop a critical eye through which to decode and filter media messages.\u201d<\/p>\n

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3. Don\u2019t raise her as a \u201cpleaser\u201d<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

Encourage her to stand up for what she needs and wants. \u201cCreate opportunities for her to use her voice,\u201d Bogue advises. \u201cAsk \u2018What do you<\/em> want?\u2019 Let her make a choice and then honor that choice.\u201d<\/p>\n

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4. Start team sports early<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

Research shows girls who play on teams have higher self-esteem. \u201cThere\u2019s a very common correlation, in my experience,\u201d says Bogue, \u201cbetween girls who play team sports and girls who suffer less with low self-esteem because they are looking to other girls for their value, and within, as opposed to looking to boys for validation.\u201d<\/p>\n

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5. Moms, don\u2019t borrow your daughter\u2019s clothes<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cYou want to let her have her own style, her own look,\u201d says Dr. Steiner-Adair. \u201cEspecially, and this is a really hard thing, if you have a mom who by society\u2019s standards is prettier or thinner than her daughter.\u201d<\/p>\n

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6. Direct your praise away from appearance<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cI think that we need to make a very conscious effort to balance our compliments about a girl\u2019s appearance with compliments about who she is and what she DOES in the world,\u201d says Bogue. \u201cChallenge yourself to match every compliment you give about your daughter\u2019s appearance with at least two compliments about something non-appearance based, and do the same for other girls who cross your path \u2014 your daughter\u2019s friends, nieces, etc.\u201d<\/p>\n

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7. Help her build skills that are independent of appearance<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cGet her involved in activities that build a sense of confidence, rather than focusing on looking good and acquiring things,\u201d Dr. Rooney suggests. \u201cSports, theater, music, art. Anything really that can help girls express themselves through words or creativity or activity rather than through their appearance or what they\u2019re carrying around.\u201d<\/p>\n

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8. Speak up about your daughter\u2019s school curriculum<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

Does it include a female perspective? \u201cImagine if you were putting together a family history,\u201d Bogue says, \u201cand you only asked the men about their memories, about their perspective. Think about all of the information that would be lost.\u201d<\/p>\n

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9. Praise your daughter for her efforts rather than her performance<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cFocus less on the outcome and more on efforts and the development of new skills,\u201d says Dr. Rooney. Mastery is what builds confidence, and learning to tolerate failure fosters resilience.<\/p>\n

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10. Be careful about what magazines you have in the house<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\u201c<\/strong>Research suggests,\u201d says Steiner-Adair, \u201cthat after 15 minutes of looking at a fashion magazine, mood shifts from curiosity and enthusiasm to comparing yourself and putting yourself down.\u201d<\/p>\n

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11. Don\u2019t trash talk other women<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cAnd don\u2019t let the boys and men in your household do it either,\u201d <\/strong>adds Dr. Steiner-Adair. \u201cDon\u2019t let kids tease each other around food or looks. Do not let that go down in your house. It\u2019s really harmful.\u201d<\/p>\n

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12. Dads: Don\u2019t treat your daughter like a damsel in distress<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cWhen fathers treat girls as though they are these fragile, helpless, little beings, \u201d Bogue says, \u201cthe message is, \u2018Your role is to look good so a man will sweep in and save you.\u2019 Instead, give her the opportunity and the tools\u2014to change her own tire, to use her voice and speak up for herself, to play sports, to be able to brush herself off and get back up. I think it\u2019s a good measure to say, \u2018If I would do it with my son, I should be prepared to do it with my daughter.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

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13. Make sure she knows you love her no matter what<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

She needs to know that you\u2019ll love her \u201cno matter how her appearance might change or how she dresses or how she might perform at something,\u201d says Dr. Rooney. \u201cBecause even though kids are so reliant on their peers for feedback when they\u2019re in their teens, what her parents think of her matters just as much as it ever did.\u201d<\/p>\n

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How to help girls build confidence based on what they can do, not what they look like By: Juliann Garey In a culture saturated with digitally altered images of impossibly thin women, raising girls with high self-esteem can be daunting indeed. But as parents, you…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1040,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[11,12],"class_list":["post-111","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-exciting-news","tag-print","tag-summer"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/111","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=111"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/111\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1042,"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/111\/revisions\/1042"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1040"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=111"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=111"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/aasacamps.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=111"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}